The Pursuit of Happiness

From the pit You took me

And placed me on Your lap like a little girl welcomed home

No longer am I lost

You found me and called me Yours

In ashes I was covered

As depression and self-hatred were my shield

No one could come near



Who desires me above all other things

Ran after me

You would not leave me alone

You kept pushing

You would not give up on me

Even in the darkest of times You were there

I thank You for Your faithfulness in my life

Your love that never fails

Your tender whispers revealed Your heart

Only You have satisfied my soul

You are now my everything

And I will never let go

I will never let go



Darkness had once consumed me

A long time ago

The father of lies

Abandoned me

Left me naked on the ground

His lies


Selfish ambition 

Was like a blanket where I could find the way out





Like a waterfall stream down my cold wet face

My suffering is like the vast ocean

Never seeming to end

Tears keep falling

Mother couldn’t help herself so why would she help me

Father wasn’t around so why would he save me

Love is all I ever wanted

To be daddy’s little girl

Someone to talk to 

To be free

Free from this curse that envelopes my very being

I need to breathe 

But I suffocated in my tears 

Drowning in agony

I was lost



A slow and terrible death



The sound of the waking dawn came calling

He showed me love



My Father is there

By my side

He was there in the dark hours 

Through the many tears

He was there

He showed me everyday

But these blind and scabbed eyes could not see it

Every time I wake

He has given me life

The one thing my heart has desired

The freedom that comes… 

The unconditional love that comes…

The Man that satisfies

He is here 



My footsteps will still be in the sand

As the ocean waves try to wash their appearance 

My presence will still be there 



For the love I have been longing for

My whole life 

What is this love my heart longs for?

Who is this person, that I desire?

Come blow upon this heart that is barely hanging on

Speak to me oh wise mouth

Take my hand and let us leap together

I will take you and we will fly

I am ready

I am ready to fall into Your loving embrace

I am ready to live for You

My Beloved I am ready


A Thousand Pieces

I can’t write

I am lost for words

I can not look in to your eyes

I can not feel love

Yours words to me were of comfort and kindness

And all I could offer you was hurt and sorrow

Thorns and needles

I just let them pierce you

Without even a care

I let you drain through the white sheets

I am a cold 


Denied time and time again

My heart was like a burning fire

Like a spirit waiting to be risen among the ashes

It calls my name

But I can not

For my flesh and spirit are too far gone 


Dead to the world

Now you are too far for me to reach

I begin to doubt 

Your breath is my oxygen

Why can’t we love

I’m scared

Tears stream down my cold hard cheeks

I can not

I can not love

I can not feel

I can not give you my all

It is lost in the black hole

It will never come back

I want to love you

I want to try

Fear has surrounded me

Left in the darkness

Naked and alone

But then you came

I thought I could never feel this way again

My heart arises from the grave

Buried beneath the dust I awake

My heart beats slowly against the rocks on the shore

Your body next to mine

Forever and always I am free